Stranger Things Have Happened

This morning after a scrumptious sunday morning breakfast at Sara and Frankys, Desiree and I went for a jog along the canal path.  We did pretty good except we forgot to bring water with us – went from the Skyway bridge all the way up to the other bridge at Carelton street and back down again.  We had the usual happenings – Desiree stood on a cement bench and flexed her non-muscles while an old guy walking a dog did a double take, my jogging pants kept slipping down so that all coming behind me saw my underwear, Desiree learned that saying goodmorning to complete strangers can have a pleasant response (and that they do not indeed turn into axe weilding, chain saw murderers) and I became a hero to a grasshopper that faced certain death.
 
Yes, thats right – a grasshopper almost took the big one today but didnt!  While jogging, a grasshopper was startled to see us rearing up on it so it took flight and catapulted itself out of our path – unfortunately that meant landing in the canal.
 
Desiree had to stop for a minute to switch her socks (another story for another day) so I watched as the poor little guy struggled out in the water.  I felt so bad and said as much, but Dee said that it was meant to die that way.  "Not on my watch!" I called in a triumphant voice as I threw myself down on the ground at the edge of the canal wall.  "Swim little guy, swim with all your might!" I called as the little grasshopper slowly turned to face me.
 
And then something wonderful happened… something so special, so miraculous… he began to swim towards me.
 
Even Dee got caught up in the excitement as the little thing kicked its tiny legs in the water.  "Swim!" we called, as he came closer and closer… but then he almost seemed to give up at the half way point!  Then I prayed to God (yes, ladies and gents, I really did that…) and he started to kick towards us again!  With Dee and I cheering him on from the top of the canal wall, he made his way, inch by inch until – YES!  – he made it to SAFETY!!!!!!!!  He climbed up the wall a little ways and fluttered his wings to shake off the water as Dee and I cheered and laughed in relief!
 
At this point, we realized how we must look to all the serious athletes passing us by on the path.  Getting up off the ground I hiked my jogging pants back up over my panties and we resumed our run, feeling just a little better about ourselves and slightly more insane then we were the day before 🙂
 
Cant wait for next Sunday!!
 

3 Comments

  1. last night i had a desire to go jogging, but i didn’t have any jogging pants that would allow the stylish showing of my panties, so i had to stay home and get fat. 
    i’m sure that that grasshopper had heard the story of fred and therefore jumped into the canal in a desperate attempt to save his life.  when he realized that you and dee were alone he made his way back.  he also was looking forward to the view that he’d get when you resumed your course.

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  2. If i wasn’t part of this family i would say you guys are all weirdos…but since i AM, I have to include myself too.  We’re weirdos.  Berni, are we still good for IKEA tomorrow?  It will be grand.
     
    jay

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  3. Way to go, Berni!  You saved that little grasshopper.  And if I may say, it sounds rather prophetic?  Or maybe just coincidental?  All I can say is this:  Sometimes a grasshopper can jump into a bad situation, but as long as that grasshopper listens to that voice from above and obeys, that grasshopper won’t go under!  : )

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